By Derrick Brown (follow on Twitter @dbrowndbrown)
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Knowing What I Do Not Know(Taking the PSAT) (1552 Words)
(52nd Day of School — October 21, 2025)
By Derrick Brown (Join Our Mailing List!)
I. Seeing the Whole Picture
Today began with new information that reframed old confusion.
I learned that <snip> was <snip>’s co-teacher in his regular geometry class … and that <snip> is an “honors” literature student who also takes engineering, architecture, and construction electives … yet remains a “regular” math student enrolled in my support class.
On paper, <snip> appears serious … structured … elite. In practice, <snip> floats between worlds … more silly than serious … more defensive than disciplined.
This duality helped me name a pattern that <snip> and I had both observed.
Some students become dual citizens … honored in one realm … and honorless in another.
They want to “be down” with the crowd … while “talking down” … to the same crowd.
They want the comfort of belonging … and the currency of distinction.
<snip> is learning how easily the two collapse into contradiction.
<snip> carries a similar passport … but travels with more awareness.
<snip>’s balance shows that identity crises can still become classrooms for growth.
I am grateful for <snip>’s thought partnership … for helping me recognize what my intuition had already whispered.
Understanding this tension has become essential to my own peace.
It is easier to extend grace once I understand the geography of confusion.
II. Testing and Fine Fellowship
Day Two of geometry testing was rough … but not ruinous.
There was fine fellowship … small laughter … and visible learning.
Students who usually hide behind noise began walking up to me with questions.
Even the ritual phrase “I am confused” became an invitation rather than an evasion.
I practiced redirecting confusion into curiosity … answering without absolving … guiding without carrying.
One of the day’s funniest moments came when several asked whether “E” could be the correct answer … though the bubble sheet listed only A, B, C, and D.
I smiled … paused … and waited.
After a beat they laughed … “Ohhh!”
That sound … the laughter of recognition … is the teacher’s truest applause.
In 1B, I spoke with DN about perpendicular lines and midpoints … how every point on a line segment is not necessarily the midpoint … and how precision distinguishes geometry from guesswork.
That short conversation felt like the day’s heartbeat.
It reminded me that meaning survives fatigue … when relationship carries it.
By 3B, the mood had lightened enough for reflection.
I realized that yesterday’s PSAT discussion deserved a sequel … a practical bridge between concept and conduct.
So I wrote and filmed a 10-minute video titled Knowing What I Do Not Know (Taking the PSAT).
Its purpose was simple … to turn philosophy into strategy … and anxiety into awareness.
III. Filming the Lesson
The shooting script began with invitation ....
“Let me show you something. This time tomorrow, many of you will be taking the PSAT.”
The PSAT … the Preliminary SAT (Scholastic Aptitude Test) and National Merit Scholarship Qualifying Test … is a “mirror” of skill and character.
It measures not only content … but composure.
It tests aptitude … attitude … and altitude.
Aptitude is ability … attitude is resilience … altitude is what the journey yields.
Success requires honesty … strategy … and preparation.
I told them that honesty means admitting what one knows and does not know.
Strategy means organizing that admission into action.
Everyone knows something … no one knows everything.
Therefore knowing what one does not know becomes a compass.
I offered a three-level system:
· Level 1: I know how to approach this and can solve it quickly.
· Level 2: I know the path … but it will take time.
· Level 3: I do not know how to begin.
Do the “Level 1’s” first … return to the “Level 2’s” … skip the “Level 3’s.”
Honest triage beats reckless pride.
An honest mind earns a strong score.
A dishonest one learns the hard way … that the best lies sound true.
I explained how reading problems and math problems share a single language … that words and numbers both demand logic.
One problem might ask for an antonym … another for a synonym … another for relationship … another for inference.
Each requires translation.
Then I said the math section “tells (all) your business.”
It reveals whether understanding lives only in memory … or also in method.
I showed 2 “difficult” math problems students might label as “Level #3” and skip … that could become “Level #2” with courage.
Both problems were brought to my attention by students in the classes that participated in my PSAT review
One student had the humility to admit confusion … then the patience to be taught … and learn how to solve the problem.
Another had the courage to ask … but lacked the humility to listen … and therefore walked away unteachable.
The camera caught me saying “This is one to skip … but let me …” … and then watching the student “escape” mid-sentence.
That is how pride interrupts learning … and how reflection preserves it.
I concluded the video with advice that felt like confession.
“The best lies sound true. To thine own self be true … especially on the PSAT. So hunker up … hunker down … and humble up. Good luck tomorrow … and better skill.”
When I finished editing … I realized that the speech was less about a test … and more about my life.
IV. The Hallway and the Phone Call
Later in the hallway I saw JW again.
I asked the same question that had silenced him yesterday … “Why did you come to me for tutoring [instead of going to formal after-school tutoring].”
This time he answered without audience … and truth arrived in its simplest form.
He said that DL told him that DL used to come to my tutoring all the time.
JW wanted the same service … the same “exception.”
When I refused to repeat a favor … that was never a favor to begin with … JW’s ego interpreted equity as insult.
Now I understood the attitude … and could release the anger.
That evening my former evaluating administrator called.
Earlier in the day he had approached a colleague I was speaking with … delivered his trademark fist bump (to the colleague) … then waited for acknowledgment that never came.
I looked straight ahead and offered none.
The call that followed could mean many things … concern from parents … “curiosity” about my teaching methods … or a reaction to my private comment (made to another colleague) that I may need to take a break for my own health.
It is what it is.
I will not pretend peace where pain remains.
I refuse to fake public harmony to hide private harm.
V. What the Day Taught
Today taught me that testing reveals truth beyond scores.
Some students mirror their teacher’s fatigue … others mirror their teacher’s faith.
Awareness is the difference.
To know what I do not know is to be both teacher and student … both observer and participant … both coach and case study.
The PSAT became a parable.
Each bubble represents a choice between ego and honesty.
Each question offers three possible responses … ready … willing … or resistant.
The students who approached with openness left lighter … those who hid behind snark left unchanged.
My own growth came in the space between … where I finally learned to answer without arguing … and to observe without absorbing.
Dual citizenship exists not only in students … but in teachers.
I, too, live between worlds … the world of structure and the world of spirit … the world that rewards containment and the world that requires creation.
My task is to translate between them without losing integrity in either language.
VI. Knowing What I Do Not Know
I do not yet know how long I can remain in a system that measures obedience more carefully than understanding … but I do know that every reflection strengthens my resolve to finish honestly.
I do not know whether a health break will become necessary … but I do know that health and peace are non-negotiable.
I do not know what students will remember about today … but I do know that truth … once spoken … stays somewhere in the room.
Every time I teach them to choose the correct answer between A and D … I am also teaching myself to choose between bitterness and balance.
Each day is its own exam … graded by grace … curved by mercy.
VII. Closing Reflection
The PSAT is not merely a practice test for college … it is practice for character.
It reveals how students handle uncertainty … and how teachers handle them.
My own score today will not appear on paper … but I believe I earned a passing grade in patience.
To know what I do not know is to breathe without boasting … to teach without demanding credit … to lead without losing heart.
The lesson is simple and endless … humility is the highest form of understanding.
Tomorrow my students will face their test … and so will I.
The rules are the same for both of us … read carefully … skip wisely … answer honestly … and rest when finished.
Selah.
(The "Follow The Leader (changED - Volume 2)" Audio and Video Album / Mixtape is also available at TeachersPayTeachers.com)
(The "changED (Volume 1)" Audio and Video Album / Mixtape is also available at TeachersPayTeachers.com)
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I am a “standup storyteller.”
I fuse rap, spoken word (poetry), oration (traditional public speaking), singing, and teaching into messages of hope, healing, and change that I write, direct, and produce to help people who help people.
Everything must change - and stay changED.
Tradition begins and ends with change.
Change begins with me and the renewing of my mind ... then continues through efforts to effect small-group discipleship (equipping others to equip others) with audiences that respect and embrace mentoring, mediation, and problem solving as tools of change.
I am the product of my mentoring relationships, peacemaking (and peacekeeping), and problem-solving ability.
My education began when I finished school.
After school, I enrolled in a lifelong curriculum that includes classes in ministry, entrepreneurship, stewardship, literacy, numeracy, language, self-identity, self-expression, and analysis / synthesis.
My projects execute a ministry that has evolved from wisdom earned through lessons learned.
I want to share this wisdom to build teams of "triple threat" fellows - mentors, mediators, and problem solvers.
We will collaborate in simple, powerful ways that allow us to help people who help people.
I now know that power is work done efficiently (with wise and skillful use of resources, interests, communication, and expertise).
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